Sunday, February 1, 2009

Takes One to Know One

Yesterday we were stocking up at my home away from home, Sam's Club, when, in the salad dressings and canned meat (?!) isle, I overheard the following conversation:

Woman A, as she caresses a giant bottle of Kraft Ranch Dressing: "Wouldn't this be a nice birthday present to myself?"
Woman B: "Get yourself one. It's only $7.88."
Woman A: "I would, but it'd be gone in a month anyway."

I feel ya, honey. While I'm not a fan of anything Kraft, I could eat homemade buttermilk Ranch dressing on pretty much anything but ice cream. No matter how stuck up about food I try to be, it's not changing anytime soon that I would eagerly consume Ranch dressing intravenously if for some reason my mouth had to be cemented shut.

I blame the four generations' worth of Tulsan blood pumping through my veins for my inability to wholeheartedly enjoy a green salad without drowning it in that lumpy, tangy substance. There is something in our DNA that has culminated over the years into a weakness not only for loud, whiny country music and Cracker Barrel merchandise, but also for Ranch dressing. And, French fries dipped in chocolate shake.

Tulsans, what are your other guilty food pleasures that would make a Yankee swoon?

11 comments:

randomblink said...

ROFLMAO!
You're gonna give those "non-locals" the wrong impression of Tulsa! lol... Over-eating Ranch and Dressing is a 'highly' red-necked manner of activity... we aren't all rednecks in heeyar... lol.

Mos Jef said...

frog legs, collard greens, pickled okra, and moonshine.

Linda said...

As an Okie raised in Bixby, living in Edmond, but feeling close enough to Tulsa to qualify, here are some guilty pleasures from childhood:
Fried bologna or fried Spam sandwiches with mayo
Butter and molasses mixed together on a plate and spread on toast
Brown beans with their juice served over white bread
Anything on a pie crust

And my more sophisticated adult guilty pleasures:
French fries dipped in Ranch dressing
Hershey's chocolate syrup on ice cream
Keebler EL Fudge butter cookies with fudge filling
Anything on a pie crust

Sadly, I have many, many more.

Maria said...

I'm actually a midwesterner (Minnesota), so the whole Ranch deal does make me gag. LOL!

Man of the West said...

Good Heavens. I'm not gonna be able to get the image of...

...French fries dipped in chocolate shake...

out of my mind easily.

Yogi♪♪♪ said...

We were eating at Johnny's yesterday where I noticed that they are charging 35 cents for extra ranch dressing. I was thinking they do not know the market.

Jeff Shaw said...

Linda. You are sick. ;)

Amanda said...

Kraft Ranch is nasty anyway....Hidden Valley ALL THE WAY!

Best fries in shake combo? wendy's fries dipped in frostee. mmmm...

♥georgie♥ said...

OMGosh Copelands has the BEST ranch dressing...it is my weakness

TuTu's Bliss said...

GREASE..I think grease is a food, doesn't everyone??

Anonymous said...

I like to call ranch "oklahoma ketchup"! lydia/brewburger

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