Sunday Scare

Do you see it?

How about now?

And now?

"WHAAAHHHHHHH! YIPES, YIPES, holy crappers!"

That's what I sounded like at about 12:30 yesterday afternoon.

Remember that story that was all over the local news last week - the one about the banana spider in the monkey fruit at the Tulsa Whole Foods? Well, it was at the forefront of my mind as I did my weekly grocery shopping. Since I hadn't managed to convince my son to give up his banana habit, I had to brave the most sparsely populated section of the Whole Foods produce department and resist the creepy-crawlies to snag some 'nanas.

Actually, I made my husband do it.

Anyway. I thought I'd made my shopping trip without death-defying incident. That was, until I saw the above.

As it turned out, it was just one of those plastic pinkie rings everyone gets at Halloween time. Still, it was pretty obvious some jackass thought it'd be funny to plant the fake spider in my precious naan bread section. In the same Whole Foods where the banana spider was found. On the day I do my grocery shopping. In my precious naan.

Thank you, whoever you are, for helping me prove to myself that my ticker is still, indeed, in great shape. Also, for the clean, midday pair of underpants.

Just For You

Happy Valentine's Day, Tasha Does Tulsa readers!


This picture of these roses is to let you all know that I think about you on long drives. Also, at the specialty cheeses counter. Because that's where I was in the Whole Foods today when I realized I hadn't gotten my mom and Meme Valentine's Day presents. So, while they'll be getting the actual roses for which I had to fight tooth and nail against the Midtown Whole Foodies getting better service because they were buying these suckers by the gross, you all get a nice, pretty picture of said roses.

And isn't that just as good? Because not only can you do whatever you want with it, but a photo never dies.


See?

Hope everyone has a great night! Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Which means DON'T SPEED. But you can definitely wear a matching Hawaiian print with your husband and little sister to your dad's wedding on the family land during June when it's 102 degrees and the humidity is at 98 percent, forces of nature against which even hot-rolled helmet hair lacquered in Aqua Net is powerless. Obviously.